Day 50 - Weight ????? - Don't Sit in the Pit

Praise God! The revival service at church tonight was awesome. I needed a spiritual re-connect.

I want to thank my CrossFit friends who listened to me today. Debbie, Ali & Cheryl helped me get down to brass tacks about what's going on in my life and how to survive it. I came to CrossFit simply to show up. I sort of mailed in the WOD, but that's what I brought today. What I really wanted to do was sit in a corner and cry or something.

The truth is that I've been depressed lately. I have spent so much energy incorporating CrossFit and Paleo eating into my life, through this challenge, that I have let other things slide, like work and Bible study. I fear telling people about some of what I'm going through because I'm afraid they'll speak things into my life that I don't want to hear. This fear is a lie, a manifestation of the imagined thoughts and actions on behalf of other people who didn't even think or do them yet.

Change is difficult, and I've encountered a lot of change lately as well. It's so draining.

I also hope to adhere to a more disciplined routine that starts my day earlier, but there's a hurdle to hop: I seem to have developed a fear of lack of sleep. The importance of sleep cannot be overstated, but I think my fear that I won't get enough is overblown. That tired-in-the-day feeling actually scares me. I need perspective.

Also, I didn't much feel like eating today. I still managed to eat plenty


Menu
Breakfast (2 blocks)
- 110 g sweet potatoes, 2 oz. chicken, 1 tsp. butter

Lunch (4 blocks)
- 1/2 cup greek yogurt, 1/2 cup cottage cheese, 15g chopped nuts, 1 Tara chocolate, 1 tbsp. c-raisins, 1 clementine

More Lunch (5 blocks)
- 3 cups romaine & spinach, 1/2 cup peas, 1/2 cup onions, 2 HB eggs, 2 oz turkey
- 1/3 cup shredded cheese, Low-cal Italian dressing

Dinner-ish (4 blocks)
- 2 cups Chan chili, 2 cups spaghetti squash

Total water consumption: 9+ quarts throughout the day, including coffee and tea

I still haven't done my writing. Tuesday... or Wednesday. Based on the rules and all that, my total points for the day: 0

Total points so far: 26