Well, it will be a few weeks before I'm back below 290. It's kind of disheartening but it's part of the journey, so I have to own it. Here's what happened...
First off, I won the CrossFit challenge. ;) It was hard work and I had tons of help. After winning I celebrated by slacking off a little. Each weekend I ate out, mostly at functions or holiday meals, and as the weeks progressed my eating went farther downhill. When the baseball field opened for business, I started eating their food, too. Looking back I do not think that the almost 15 pounds I've regained comes entirely from that, though.
I also was given the go-ahead in that time, by my doctor, to go off of my blood pressure medication. It's a dual-action med, an ACE inhibitor (I think) and a diuretic. My weight had been going up slightly but steadily until soon after I went off the meds, than it shot up. I've been flirting with 300 ever since. By the day's end my legs and ankles are swollen and my shoes look like mushrooms. I can feel it in my face and neck sometimes. I don't feel too out-of-whack when I get up, but as the day progresses I feel bloated and not as good.
I'm back to working out more, and eating right most of the time, and as the days pass I will make alterations to the plan as necessary. But as I understand it, the change in medication may affect my body for a while as it continues to leave my system. This is how things like this can go! I may put on more weight. I may feel weird for a while. Who knows? Also, my doctor will be taking my BP in the office in a week or so. If he's not happy, I may have to go back to the meds or, if I have my way, I might be able to try a lesser medication, such as a diuretic alone.
Either way I have to accept reality here, and that is two-fold in thei case. First, I am responsible in part for this mess. I went a bit off the deep end. Yet I need to learn through doing, and this is part of the process so I can't regret it forever or resent myself here. Time to move on. Also, the medication issue is just part of the process, too. I'm no victim, and if I have to go back to meds for a while, I need to accept that as cheerfully as possible and keep working hard. It is God, not I, who decides how this all goes. I can influence but not determine.
The worldly American is taught that results are everything, the natural consequence of doing right--if you don't get "it," it's your fault; if you do get "it" it doesn't matter so much how you did it. In truth the process is everything. The process is so much more important because how you do what you do says more about who you are than the results do. We don't seem to by this in America. It's not that results have no value, they're just overvalued.
If I do my best, stay on top of things, and keep growing, all will be as well as can be. I'll get "there" eventually. There will be bumps in the road but if my attitude is good and my process is sound, I will simply grow stronger from them. This is one of those times.
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